“Marilyn Monroe.” “Huh? What?” I asked her, walking with her across the deserted street to retrieve her smartphone. “That’s the line Tom Ewell’s character (I think the character’s name is Richard something.) says in The Seven Year Itch. I suppose I should say, ‘Really? It happens to me all the time.’ That’s what she says.” (She said that in a great, breathy, innocent Marilyn voice imitation.) “How can you be…? I mean… You’re acting like nothing special just happened. How did you? What happened to the motorcycle? Who were…” I said to her, the incredulity obvious in my voice, as she nonchalantly grabbed my arm and began walking back in the direction of her apartment. “It’s OK,” Simone said simply. “Don’t worry about it.” I began to say something to her, but she put a finger against my lips, shook her head no, and said “shh.” We walked passed the dark storefronts, offices, and warehouses, back to her place in absolute silence. I kept expecting to hear police sirens, but there was no. Nige," I said, "what gives?" Same to you Phil, what gives?" he replied, "Get your end away did ya?" Fuckin' right I did, and you?"He nodded, then sat back, took a big swig from the bottle, then spread his legs out wide and made a big show of scratching his balls through his jeans. That made me smile. Never one to be backwards about coming forward is Nige."So, Nige, spill the beans then, what happened to you in the pub? Last I saw of you, you were ducking through the crowd when you went off to find the Gents. What happened after that?" Oh, you'll never believe what 'appened then," said Nigel, "I didn't believe it meself at first, an' it's taken all week for it all to sink in." Well, go on then, what happened? I want to know all the gory details remember, and when you hear about my weekend you just won't believe it either," I said.Nigel cleared his throat, took another swig from the bottle, and started telling me all about the two birds he found in the men's loo, and how they'd wanked.
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